This is not the way!

I'M SO SAD I DON'T KNOW WHY. I JUST SUDDENLY FEEL SO LEFT OUT AND I'M SO WORRIED AND SCARED CAUSE I JUST DON'T WANT TOMO TO COME.
AND I'M SO SICK NOW, TEARY EYES AND BLOCKED NOSE AND NUMB BRAIN AND SWOLLEN ANKLE AND SLIGHT FEVER. WHAT THE FUCK. I'M SO MISERABLE.

I FEEL SO SAD AND..I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT.
FUCK I FEEL SO WORTHLESS.

If I really don't exist, will anyone even bother? Tomo is the finals for Singapore Idol and oh, that'll act as a kind of comfort for me. At least the people in the show are actually cheering and I'm imagining it as a kind of birthday song for me.